Dave Berry Quotes

Dave Berry Quotes

Your hand and your mouth agreed many years ago that, as far as chocolate is concerned, there is no need to involve your brain.

Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege.

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.

No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.

It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity.

If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

Each year, millions of skiers come to Colorado to experience its superb emergency medical facilities.

It's income tax time again, Americans: time to gather up those receipts, get out those tax forms, sharpen up that pencil, and stab yourself in the aorta.

The easiest way to make a fruitcake is to buy a darkish cake, then pound some old, hard fruit into it with a mallet. Be sure to wear safety glasses.

You should definitely visit the Louvre, a world-famous art museum where you can view, at close range, the backs of thousands of other tourists trying to see the Mona Lisa.